Hit Rock Bottom

So if you have been following my blog you know I struggle with my weight. The motivation is on and off again and I guess boils down to psychologically I have not wanted it bad enough. I mean truly if you want something bad enough nothing is going to stop you. Instead I find excuses NOT to work out everywhere. I am a very busy person.... there is no denying that, yet I know I could find a way if it mattered to me enough.

This morning I hit rock bottom and when I say rock bottom I mean I ended up under the rock.I got up this morning and made my family homemade blueberry pancakes, sausage, and scrambled eggs. I ate two pancakes (very little syrup-- not a fan, some eggs, and one piece of sausage. After eating I sat at the table not feeling great and a light bulb went off~~~~ This is how I used to feel every time I ate when I was pregnant. Now don't worry I KNOW I am not pregnant so I tore through the hutch to find my old sugar meter. See through all 3 of my pregnancies I was VERY bad gestational diabetic. I am talking specialists and insulin shoots several times a day. My body stopped producing insulin while I was pregnant yet after giving birth my body would bounce back.

I am not going to talk about all the details but needless to say I knew then I needed to lose weight and take better care of my body. Fast forward two years after my last child was born..... the last few months I have felt off. When I say off I mean tired ALL the time, no energy, no drive. I am thirsty NON stop and just have told my husband something is wrong. Well that something hit be hard like a rock today.... After breakfast my sugar was 245..... one hour later 283, two hours later 300!!!! If you don't know about sugars.. ALL those numbers are bad and I mean VERY BAD.

I have spent all morning crying. See we are a one income family and my husband is the one that works. We love his job but it is a mom and pop place with no benefits. I am a full time college student and have three kids. The last time I checked on purchasing insurance I was quoted $475 (lowest) a month PLUS a $50,000 deductible. I am high risk because of my weight (250)...... well let me just tell you there is no way we can afford that and keep a roof over our kids' heads. I feel like a failure.... a failure to myself, a failure to my kids, and a failure to my husband. I knew this was coming if I did not do something to change my life around. Don't get me wrong I did change things.... all sodas have been banned from my kids (always have been), adults can not drink them in my house either. I drink water all the time and we have started eating better. Thats was not enough and I knew it was not enough.

I am worried. I don't know what to do or where to turn right now. I know I am not going to give up and I know where I have to go from here (up) but I am not sure I can. I have hit rock bottom and the only place to go is up. Just needing support, prayers, and motivation to turn it all around.

OMG It's Monday!

It is Monday..... how did that happen? Last week was Spring break for me in school and instead of being a good girl and staying on top of everything in school...... YEP you guessed it I did nothing. SO now I am struggling to catch up and stay ahead. So where did last week go?

For one I am participating in Mamavation's 2weekchallenge. Let me just say this right now....... LOT"S of hot baths! I realized how out of shape I am YET how a simple challenge can get me moving. I have been hitting my 10,000 steps AND doing the daily workout. Don't worry MrBookieboo I will get Pyramids in today as well. I have not weighed in this week because I truly want to see how the two weeks results are!

I have not been to the gym this past week. For one my mom being in has really messed with our schedules, but as I do not see her very often I made an exception this week. I am also SUPER proud of myself this weekend... Faith's 2 year birthday was Saturday and I did AWESOME!

I served cake and cupcakes, smoked chicken and pork, potato salad, baked beans, veggie tray, cucumber sandwiches, and stuffed strawberries. I ate around 4oz of the smoked chicken with only one teaspoon of BBQ sauce, tons and tons of veggies, about 15 cucumber sandwiches (party turned into a spa party lol) and only one stuffed strawberry. I drank some lemonade and water avoiding the sweet tea and soda. Oh course my kids and husband drank the tea as they do not drink soda, I was taken back by the number of kids who were allowed to drink soda though. Dinners have been okay but not great falling back on Subway since we have been so busy this last week.

Goal for this week: to hit the gym at least 3 days plus complete the 2weekchallenge. I also am praying about applying to be a Mamavation mom, I could do it this time as their is NO chance of getting pregnant during it lol :)

Time to Spring Forward

So Sunday was Spring Forward..... Who of you forgot? I changed my clocks but other than that Im still stuck on the falling back.... Falling back on old habits. I am the queen of making excuses and before I know it we are in March. Yes March and I have once again failed to make progress on my resolution. Thinking back I know this is NOT where I thought I would be today this year.

Don't get me wrong, I am very happy about some things in my life this year.

• School is going good. 7 more classes and 9 more months and I will have my associates.
• I am finding more time for my kids.
• Business is going good and my team is growing.
• I am eating better and Fruits and Veggies are my staple NOT carbs.

That's where my list ends though. I am yoyo'ing with my fitness goals. I will say when I am working out I give it my 100% all and I walk away very proud. The problem is I do it for a day or two and then life gets in the way and before I know it a week has gone by since I last hit the YMCA or even the yoga ball. I want this I REALLY do.... but I don't know how to make the time and stay motivated.

I look at myself in the mirror... this is NOT who I want to be. Intimacy between hubby and I is nonexistent.... and it is because of me. I am not comfortable, I don't want to be touched or looked at, and even though I am sure he does not feel the way I think.... I am gross. (This is not to say everyone over weight is gross but to me I am)

I get busy and then all I want to do is go to bed, then I get depressed because I feel lazy. YES I know I am not lazy. Running my in home business', helping 60 people run theirs, doing a full time college load, taking care of three kids and a husband...... I am a busy person BUT when it comes to getting myself healthy I am lazy. I let excuses consume me and I TRULY do not know how to break the habit.

I am proud of the fact that I am eating better, I can go so far as to say I am eating HEALTHY for the first time ever. I have given up soda 100%, no fast food (Saturday I ate Chick Fil A and I was sick the rest of the day!), and I am making sure fruit and veggies are stocked fully in my kitchen.

I need to be pushed..... I am competitive and don't like to lose. I think that is why I did so well almost three years ago. I need people holding me accountable. I know losing weight, getting healthy, my family..... should all be enough to get me going yet it has not been. I need help.... I need accountability..... I need tough love (yet someone that when I do it makes me feel accomplished and great) I need something to help me stick to this. I am lost and I don't want to continue on this cycle but Im so worried I will. I would love phone calls asking if I have worked out and if I haven't a good talking to. Someone to celebrate with when I do.....

I have thought about trying the insanity work out. Hubby and I bought it a year ago and it is still sealed. I heard it is HARD and I mean really hard. I was watching the infomercial today as I sipped coffee and its crazy but I want that shirt. I want to be able to say I did it.... look at me!

I want to RUN a 5k and finish the couch to 5 k program..... I want to make a change in my life. How, How, How, do I get there.... How do I stay motivated, How do I stop making excuses? What has worked for YOU? Please share your tips and tricks..... I want to make a change!

Losing 100 Pounds of Me

So in 2010 I joined the Mamavation community. I had found a great group of ladies that supported each other and helped each other to become the moms they needed to be. After all most of us want to keep up with our kids which means being in shape. That year I was voted in to being a Mamavation Mom.... What is that you may ask? Well taken from their site:

Mamavation Moms lose weight in a boot camp experience without having to leave the home. They are set up with support, tools, and professional coaches to help transform mind and body on this journey. As they are learning healthy living and losing weight they live their lives on a stage for seven weeks. The campaign becomes a virtual docudrama with real challenges and victories as they become the stars of the campaign.

I could not have been happier but life got in the way. As a blogger I was going to New Orleans for a few days of fun and blogging connecting with others in Mamavation and Blogging world, but in a "real life" setting. Two days before leaving I was in a car accident (husband driving) and although it was not bad it was bad enough. Then In New Orleans I felt 'off' I blamed it on the rigid schedule of being in the Mamavation boot camp. I know I was not pleasant to be around and lost friends during this trip. Less than a week or two after coming home I realized this was more than a bootcamp/weight loss problem..... I was pregnant!

This was a severe shock to me as I was taking birth control very adamantly I might ask. I was not happy as I had lost around 50 pounds or so since joining Mamavation earlier that year. I also was not ready for a third child..... but God had other plans. I had to drop out of the Mamavation program and focus on an impending child and a failing marriage. Right at two years later I can say I have a wonderful daughter and a stronger marriage..... I am also back up to the high weight of 250!

I have decided I am done.... It is time to have a new me! I recently messaged Leah (@bookieboo)
to ask if I could come back to Mamavation and she simply asked me to write a post, link up, and come back. I was so happy at this second chance. So here it is:

I am back up to 250 but I am determined to lose the weight needed and be a healthier mom for my kids. This time I am not alone in that my husband will be on this journey with me. Soda is out of the house and water is the thing we are drinking. I need all the help I can get though. This is why I asked to join Mamavation again. I am a competitive person.... I do best when I am in that scenario and when people are cheering me on and pushing me harder. I am asking for that again Mamavation please help support me and I will you. I WILL not let you down.

“This post is sponsored by Schick Intuition and hosted by Mamavation – a community dedicated to obesity prevention & weight loss for women and I’m writing this to be entered into a giveaway”

Mamavation Monday Week 20

This post is one week behind. I post on Mamavation.com on Wednesday's then post the same post here on Sunday night! 

This week has been a very awkward week for me. Last Wednesday my husband wrecked my car and although thankfully no one was seriously injured I did not walk away 100%. I was released Monday though to begin adding back in my exercising, so Tuesday I worked out to EA Sports Active Upper Body. Wednesday (today) I was able to do Tracey Mallet Quick Blast Fat Burner. I actually just finished this one and am sitting here icing my shoulder.

Mamavation Monday Week One as a Mom (17)

(posted on mamavation.com on Wed) So today was my second day as a Mamavation Mom. It is very interesting that in two short days my thinking is already changing. First off I think about everything in terms of how can this raise my heart rate or make this activity into a work out. I loved meeting with Leah yesterday and hearing about this journey I have begun. We were sent workouts for the EA Active and EA Active More Workouts so last night I sat down and set up my workout.

This one is a nail biter #mamavation (top 4 sooo close to each other)

The title of this post is what Leah aka @bookieboo tweeted out 18 minutes ago! Now I may not be in the top four; I have no way of knowing but I am sending out a personal plea to all of my readers and friends! Please vote; you have till 9pm Est to vote.

All you have to do is go to Mamavation and vote for @all_about_savin

Thank You everyone this means the world to me! Also please look for two new giveaways to be added sometime tomorrow!

One Last Push till the End?

Mamavation has been the utmost center of my life this past 7 days! I have talked to more people about my weight loss journey and this wonderful support/ guidance network; than I have ever talked to anyone about my weight. Tonight marks the start of the 5th campaign for two moms on mamavation. There are 6 (including me) wonderful mom's all vying for these two spots. In the end everyone of us deserve and could benefit greatly from being chosen as a mom.

I am so thankful to each of you that have voted, whether you have voted in secret or let me know, I am forever indebted to you. I pledge this to all of my readers, friends, supporters: No matter what happens tonight I will continue to work as hard as I can and try to be an inspiration in your life!

You can still vote today (Just make sure you get your votes in before 8pm). Just go to Mamavation and vote for all_about_savin! This last push is so important and I thank each of you! I know I have focused on me me me this week but today I wanted to share with you the 5 other ladies that are running for the 2 mom spots.
Good Luck each of you and know you make so many people proud @IamSucceeding @jennydecki @ljenator @chobysauce @rachelsteffan

Mamavation Monday Sixteen~ 1 yr Anniversary

Wow I am amazed when I think Mamavation is One year old. I am more excited because my baby turned one on the 10th! SO officially HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you both. I truly wish I had been a part of Mamavation since the beginning. I mean Leah and all the Sistas are amazing and the greatest thing in my life since sliced WHOLE wheat bread!!!!

Your Comments Mean the world to me!

I will admit I often feel like everything I blog, unless it is a giveaway, is important to know one except me. My Mamavation posts get the comments from the same sistas each week and although they mean the world to me I just did not feel like I was reaching people.

Over this week with the voting of the Mamavation Finalists I have been shown just how WRONG I was. I will admit I usually hate being wrong but this time I will accept it graciously! I have received so many comments and emails of people telling me what my posts mean to them and how inspirational I am to people.

Saying Goodbye to the Garbaage Mamavation Style

Today I was sitting in the kitchen drinking my pot cup of coffee and I looked up at the top of my fridge. I was applaud at what I seen. I mean it's not that I don't look up there, it's not real dirty, its just that it was covered in normal unhealthy foods. Foods is not even the correct term actually garbage and body wreckers is more like it. These were not my items; worse they were things I bought and fed my four year old son. So I took down the baskets and gathered up all this garbage into one large basket. 

Honestly how horrible is that! The sad part is this is nothing compared to what used to be lurking onto of the fridge that has since found it's way into my son.

Help me be the next Mamavation MOM

Hey everyone so this is day two of voting and I am so excited! I am so thankful for all the wonderful comments you have left. They truly touch my heart; and yes I read every one of them. I truly hope you will keep spreading the word about voting and entering to win the faboulous prizes. I really do want to give away a Wii, Ipod Nano 16gb, or an Amazon Kindle. I chose to give away the Wii because its what first started me on my fitness journey, the IPod because it helps me get my steps in everyday, and the Kindle.... well because its cool!

So don't forget to vote today and tell EVERYONE you know to vote for me too. Head on over to the giveaway and enter to win one of these great prizes! As long as my name is announced as a mamavation mom I will choose the winner on the 13th. Yes I know it will be announced on the 12th but if I win I will faint so need time to come around ;)

Please note I know blogger is having some issues posting comments. They are working on this and it is pretty widespread. DO NOT FEAR!!! All comments you make are emailed to my blog email and I am keeping a log. If once this glitch is fixed your comments do not appear I will manually add them all. SO please keep entering and voting!

From the bottom of my heart THANK YOU!!!

I need your help! Win a Wii or 2 other prizes!!!

Hey everyone so since April I have been a sista of Mamavation. You have read my weekly posts, watched as I participated in the Move It and Lose It Challenge where I lost over 10% of my body weight, and you have since watched me apply to be the next Mamavation Mom. Well late last night I found out I was chosen as a finalist by Leah and now the chips fall into YOUR lap! I need your help if I want (and OH how I want) to be the next Mamavation mom. All you have to do is vote every day starting NOW and tell all your friends. You can vote for me by going to http://www.mamavation.com and voting for all_about_savin. The voting box is right under the @Earthfootwear ad.  How this works is you can vote every 24 hours on every computer, phone, internet connection you have. So if you have access to 2 forms of internet then vote from both every 24 hours; same if you have 50.

I really need this so I can continue to get on track with a healthy weight and lifestyle for my kids, husband, and self. Ok so what do you get out of this??? I will love you forever isn't that enough? NO??? Okay Okay:


WIN IT: One Voter will win their choice of a brand new Wii System, IPod Nano 16 GB, or an Amazon Kindle.






MANDATORY ENTRY: Vote for me to be the next Mamavation mom. This is on the honor system as there is no way for me to check you voted. If I don't win no prize will be awarded so please truly vote! Open to Us and Canadians (though anyone can vote) because of shipping no International.

EXTRA ENTRIES:

• Vote Daily (1 entry each time you vote on each computer, phone, etc)
  
• Follow my Blog (1 entry)
• Subscribe to my blog and verify  (1 entries)
• Tweet about this giveaway, up to 2 times daily (must wait an hr between tweets)  Help @all_about_savin be the next #Mamavation Mom and Win a Wii or two other great prizes  http://ow.ly/274yJ  PLS RT!  
• Blog about this giveaway. Must include a link. (1 entry)
   
  
  
  
  
  

  Please note the prizes are being awarded by me. Nintendo, Amazon, and Apple are in no way affiliated with this giveaway. I am sorry I can only award if I win as the cost is high. If you participate and I don't win a smaller prize will be given out to be determined on the 13th. Can you help me to spread my news and need for votes? Do you have a media outlet you would be willing to share my story with? Please let me know! Thank you so much!

This giveaway will run from 7.5.10 until 7.12.10, please leave separate comments for each entry, winner will be selected via Random.Org  & emailed. They will then 48 hours to respond, or another winner will be drawn. Please see my disclosure policy for details about reviews and giveaways! U.S. & Canada residents only please.

Mamavation Monday Fifteen

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY EVERYONE!

This week has been my most active week since joining Mamavation. @Vidia2Be made me a challenge on Monday night during mamavation t.v. She challenged the two of us to hit 20,000 steps in one day by July 4th (today). Now I am the type that loves challenges I think that is why I really worked my booty during the Move It and Lose It challenge. There is nothing wrong with that, there are just people that thrive on challenges. So anyways, I accepted the challenge open arms. Now let me tell you Monday night I reached 10080 steps. Not bad and deffinetly over the 10,000 goal I had. So how did I do on the challenge:

Tuesday: 20581

Wednesday: 20026

Thursday:  20454

Friday: 20407

Saturday: 12013

Sunday:25142

Working Out Taebo Style

Today as I was roaming around the world of twitter I seen a tweet from @BookieBoo aka Leah about her airing her workout with J Raw in California. Leah will be airing this every Monday on Mingle Tv and as soon as I have more information I will let you know. Let me say I have never in my life done Taebo ... okay okay I have never even seen Taebo being done. I am trying to push myself further than I ever have exercise and fitness wise.

I need your help Today Please

I wanted to ask any of you that have a few min a favor. I am applying to be a mamavation mom and need a couple of you to please go to this link and comment on that post for @all_about_savin that you would like me to be the next mamavation mom and why.
If I get this its life changing. I get over 6k in experts and equipment to help me lose weight while participating in a 7 week boot camp. Please help me out. Also (if I am chosen for one of the final 5) I will be asking you ladies to vote for me daily. ALL you have to do is click on my name and vote once that post goes live. Anyways more details on this when and if I make final five.

If you comment on the link above please post your email so I can send you some coupons :) what you get youll never know lo.

Mamavation Week Fourteen

I have been busy busy busy this week! The boys and I have walked 4 out of six days. I will be posting my Mamavation posts on Sunday from now on so my progress with always be from Monday to Sunday! Yesterday the boys and I went and walked around the swap meet and then after dinner we went to the park. I was so estatic when I looked at my steps from yesterday! My total was whopping 14536!!! I also consumed more than 100 ounces of water! I am going to start posting my water consumption and my steps in a weekly update starting next week (I need a week to update) 

Mamavation Week Thirteen

Wow I have been involved with Mamavation for thirteen weeks! The past two weeks I have made excuses, not worked out very much, ate poorly at times, and overall let myself down. This morning was a new day and when I woke up and read over my posts since joining Mamavation I was inspired! Yes inspired by myself and I don't mean that to sound conseated.  I mean in thirteen weeks I have made some serious changes:

Mamavation Week Twelve

Help!!! I don't know what is wrong with me but I just can not seem to get my self motivated any longer. I did not work out even once this week and I think I walked one day where my steps reached 10,000. I hate to admit it but there is even a day I only hit 1,500! I am ashamed and to be honest confused on how to fix this! I need motivation and drive! I have decided I WILL be applying this month to be the new Mamavation mom! I really need Leah to come here and kick my behind! I would love for her to pull a Jillian!

Now to explain I am not making excuses per say. I have only seen my husband twice for a total of 5 days since Mother's Day. It is taking a toll on me in every way. I feel like a single mom and I am exhausted, depressed, and well over worked. We are trying to remedy this situation but right now there are just so many things up in the air. I am also preparing to move.... yet again. My mil wants to get away from the apartment and rent a house in the country. Needless to say..... more stress!

Mamavation Monday: Week Eleven

First let me say I am sorry I did not post last week. For some reason our WiFi in my complex was down for about 4 days. I tried to go to the library but with an 11 month old that just does not work well. The past two weeks have been so hard for me emotionally which has taken it's toll on me with working on getting in shape. I describe it as a high and then coming down.